Take your souvenir and stop your swearing

I really don't know what's wrong with me lately. I've been very uptight and... bitchy? I guess that's the best word for it. Ugh.

As of right now, I'm desperately trying to write an essay on an essay in one of my literature books called "How to Listen to Music" by Aaron Copland. Let's just get this straight, a good writer I may be, but this shit fails. I can't think up a single sentence. And what's more, Michael is sitting with his computer in his lap right now trying so hard to come up with something for me, to no avail. And the worst part is, I'm... ANGRY at him for not being able to come up with anything. What is wrong with me? He doesn't have to help me at all, and I'm being condescending and hypocritical towards him. Do I expect him to be perfect or something? Seriously, I can't do it MYSELF, so why am I expecting someone else to outshine me at this? It's my homework. Jeeze.

I want to reach out and touch him, let him know I'm here and I appreciate him trying to help. Let him know I'm sorry for being a jerk these past few days. Make up for the bad things I've said. But.. I can't. I feel too far away. And if I touch him, it might send my glass world crashing into nothingness. Things are too fragile right now. As am I. As am I. And I can't risk showing any sign of weakness or compassion. Not right now anyway.

Road Trip in a little more than a week. I'm excited about that. I mean, yeah, the cabin will be nice, and so will all of the awesome rides, and the hot tub... but I'm most excited about driving there with my friends shoved in my car. My ipod blaring (I got a touch by the way, it's amazing.), My speakers blaring, Bass pounding, Alex screaming at the speed. Agh. I'm excited.

Alas, I need to get back to my work.
Till next time.

P.S. I also recently got a tattoo. Corey and I designed it. Well, he mostly designed it. I told him what I wanted, and then I did the coloring and etc. It's amazing. Didn't hurt as bad as I thought. Pictures soon?